It ALMOST happened. Almost.
We got a call from our social worker yesterday telling us that she had some 3 year old twins who were needing a home. A family.
The state was in process of terminating the parental rights of the biological parents and these twins would be up for adoption.
Just like that I got "the call."
All those months of preparation and all those months of being told that we would wait years and all those moments of telling myself not to expect a call anytime soon had not prepared me for that call. Now what?
Sadly, the social worker had very little information about these children but promised she would find out more and tell me this morning some details about the sibling group.
Last night I couldn't sleep. I had become too comfortable in my easy life. We have our day to day routine down and I all of a sudden found myself faced with a total disruption of my life and that of the family.
I was a wimp. A faithless one at that and I admit I felt very ashamed.
This morning I dug deep into my soul and remembered why we chose this path, this journey into adoption. It's not about me or us. It's about much, much more. It's about having faith and trusting Him to provide not only the finances but also providing the patience and the grace and the love.
What did I do? I called my social worker this morning and my heart was filled with joy and excitement and anticipation! This was THE moment! These are OUR children!!
Unfortunately she informed me that these kids were actually not available to us. We would have to wait. Again.
So here I am back to my comfortable and familiar routine. Only now, I am disappointed and yet hopeful at the same time. Next time, and I pray there will be a next time, I will not crouch in fear. I will be faithful and graceful and grateful for the blessings of adoption and of family. I will be here ready.
Here's to a week of awakening.
Hope your weekend is blessed!
Friday Phone Dump (now that my teen is here to put it together for me:-)
